


Dashing Dreams

by Tahlruil



Series: Faking It and Making It [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Insecure Bucky Barnes, Insecure Tony Stark, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 14:02:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9552107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tahlruil/pseuds/Tahlruil
Summary: Sure, Tony'd asked Bucky to pretend to be his boyfriend and attend Pepper's wedding, but he didn't mean anything by it. They were barely friends, which was Bucky's own damn fault, so what hope was there for more? But when he gets some insider information from another of the wedding guests, he dares to hope that maybe, just maybe, he can change that.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So Bucky and I have been arguing over this sequel in my head for like, a month now. I had planned to just do a single chapter that was just his POV from "Mistakes Are My Thing", but he was like 'nah'. So instead here's the first of what'll be two or three chapters, with a bit more exposition than I'd expected. XD I need to learn how to balance dialogue and exposition a lot better. :P
> 
> I've been a bit down in the dumps, with my muse mostly deserting me in the wake of all my issues, so I hope this is a decent start to this story!
> 
> Comments are greatly appreciated and loved, and make me squeal with joy. <3 Thanks so much for reading!

Virginia Hogan, née Potts, was gorgeous in an intimidating, untouchable kind of way. Knowing how she’d earned the nickname ‘Pepper’ (and it sure as fuck wasn’t from the adorable sprinkle of freckles on her nose and cheeks) only cemented that impression for Bucky. Sure, Tony thought the world of her, and he’d seen the way her cool smile melted into something warm and sweet for both her new husband and her former lover, but fuck. Bucky never, ever wanted to be on her bad side. He’d been on his very best behavior when they were introduced, been too nervous to enjoy the dance she claimed from him, and had only barely managed to repress a shudder when she murmured a poison-sweet warning about exactly what she’d do to him if ‘James’ hurt Tony.

Yeah, Pepper was fucking terrifying. He wasn’t ashamed of needing to knock back three fingers of whiskey to fortify his nerves once their dance was finally over.

Her kid sister, Patricia-please-call-me-Trish? Cute as a fucking button, and the way she laughed brightly as he swung her around the dance floor eased some of the tension that he’d carried since arriving at the posh event. These weren’t really his kind of people – hell, they weren’t even Tony’s kind of people, and it sucked that his ‘date’ had to deal with them often enough to know their names. Even Pepper seemed to be avoiding a good half of the room, so they were either shitty family members or irritating business acquaintances. Either way, they’d been invited out of the need to be polite, not any desire to actually have them there.

If they didn’t stop fucking hitting on him and Tony, he was going to start hitting back.

But Trish was a breath of winter-fresh air, so he absolutely didn’t mind entertaining her while Tony did his mandatory laps around the dance floor with his colleagues. Especially not after she’d confided that she’d been taking swing lessons, and didn’t it suck that the stuff the band played was more conducive to waltzing? He’d been happy to prove her wrong under the disapproving stares of quite a few of the other guests, which might have deterred him after a single song. But Pepper was doing that warm-sweet thing, and Pepper and Trish’s mom was beaming happily at them, and Tony… fuck. Tony watched them with a soft smile and eyes that were almost hungry, ignoring his partners to the point of being rude himself. That combined with Trish’s happy laughter was enough to keep him going. Everyone watching with heavy brows and a sneer on their lips could suck his cock. Or maybe… just maybe, if he was lucky enough and the look in Tony’s eyes meant what he desperately wanted it to, his date would be willing to, ah, handle that part of the evening.

Not that Bucky was ever that lucky, but as he allowed Trish to drag him off the dance floor for refreshments, he let himself wish. The little scamp didn’t let him stay distracted for long though, and when he leveled an unimpressed glare at the fizzing soda she placed in his hand, she only started to laugh again.

“Well I’m only nineteen! It wouldn’t be fair if you got to drink in front of me,” she teased, green eyes sparkling with mischief. “If I don’t get to get drunk to put up with all these asshats, you don’t either.” When she stuck her tongue out at him, Bucky growled playfully.

“Watch yer language, squirt, or your sister’ll decide I’m corruptin’ ya or some shit. Don’t need her after my ass.” The girl only giggled, evading Bucky’s lazy swat with ease.

“Aww, don’t worry James, I’ll protect you! Not that you need me to, not when you and Tony are making googly-eyes at each other.” Yeah, it was definitely mischief in those twinkling eyes, and Bucky only just held back a sigh – being teased by imps he could break in half with very little effort was apparently to be his lot in life. Steve’d like this one for certain, and it was too bad the scrappy little blond was stuck in New York and unlikely to ever meet her. It sorta sucked that _he’d_ probably never get to see her again. “Tony is the best shield against Ginny’s wrath you’ll ever have. That’s why I work hard to keep him liking me.” Turning to the dance floor, she blew a kiss at the man in question. Because he was ridiculous and _watching them_ , Tony pantomimed catching it and swooning, much to the irritation of the woman he was dancing with.

“So smarts’re a family trait. Good ta know.” Yeah, she was adorable, and maybe… well. She’d talked about transferring to NYU in the fall, and if she ended up in the area, maybe he could check up on her. Even if he wasn’t ‘James’ – and how fucking lucky was it that Tony’s boyfriend had his formal first name? – and he and Tony weren’t really together, she might still appreciate a friendly eye or two on her. Eyes that didn’t belong to family, so she could screw around and screw up without her terrifyingly competent big sister ever getting wind of it. Kid deserved it just for being practically the only one between eighteen and sixty not actively trying to talk her way into his or Tony’s pants. Yeah, he’d try’n keep in touch, and maybe she’d get to meet Stevie after all. “Glad you ain’t scary as she is though, lemme tell you. Just about pissed mahself when we were dancin’.” The spray of soda that left her mouth at that was hilarious, mostly because it had missed him and soaked the bartender instead.

“Oh my god! Oh my god I’m so sor-… Jesus, I can’t believe you just said…” Embarrassed and giggling and clearly not sure how to handle either one, Trish couldn’t seem to gather herself enough to apologize properly. Bucky was definitely _not_ hiding a smug smirk behind his own drink. “James! Oh my god, sir, I am so, so sorry. Oh my god.” The nonplussed man behind the bar was reassuring her and admirably fending off her attempts at dabbing at his shirt with a napkin.

“Leave ‘im alone, fer fuck’s sake,” he muttered, rolling his eyes and gently tugging the teen back into her seat. “He’s fine. And I wasn’t kiddin’ either. Pepper’s scary. Tony loves her’n all, and I c’n see Happy does too, but fuck. I don’t think I could ever manage ta ask ‘er out even if I was straight. My balls’d shrivel up’n hide the second her eyes met mine.”

“Oh my _god_.” Trish was lost to helpless giggles again, and Bucky smirked and saluted the bartender with his glass in acknowledgement of the other man’s thankful look. He was able to replace her drink and vanish while she laughed over Bucky’s crass humor, now hanging onto his arm as she hid her face in his shoulder. “Oh my god. You’re… you’re so right! She’s… she’s so scary, and you… but you… oh my god. Oh my god. You _have_ to let me tell her you said that, please.”

“Only after I reach minimum safe distance.”

“Just hide behind Tony! He’ll think it’s hilarious too. He’ll keep you safe.”

“I dunno. If she were really after m’blood, I think he’d let ‘er have it.”

“Nah. Not with the way he looks at you.” Pulling away, Trish made a playful kissy face at him, one that made him growl and hide the expression with his hand. Laughing, the teen sat back even further, reaching for her newly-full soda, looking more thoughtful now. “No, really. He looks at you… not exactly like he used to look at her. He always… look, I love Tony like a brother, and I know Ginny loves him too. But I think… he always put her on this pedestal, you know? Like… he loved her, but he never really thought he could reach her, hold her. Not the way he wanted to. I’m not… it was real, the way they felt, that isn’t what I mean, but it wasn’t… sustainable? Yeah. It wasn’t sustainable, in the long run.”

“’M sure they did their best?” Bucky managed, squirming in his seat a little. It felt wrong, talking about this when Pepper’d just married another man. It felt even _more_ wrong to be getting such intimate details about how Trish saw his supposed boyfriend. He and Tony weren’t close, much as he wanted them to be, so hearing this was just… uncomfortable. “And I can see she loves Happy. So-”

“Oh no, it’s for the best, trust me. Because that’s not how Hap looks at her. He looks at her like she’s a real, flesh and blood woman, standing right there where he can touch her. He does love her, and she loves him, and they’re…”

“Sustainable.”

“Yeah. Because they both see someone they can reach.”

“Huh. You’re kinda deep’n observant fer’a kid. … how does… how does Tony look at me then?”

“… like he _wants_ to touch you, but he doesn’t know how. Like he doesn’t think you’d reach back.” Her expression was too knowing, and her eyes almost sad, and _fuck_ , she’d clearly guessed the truth. Bucky felt himself going ramrod straight, every muscle in his body going tense; quickly, he shifted his plastic cup to his flesh hand. Sometimes when he got nervous, he forgot to monitor how much strength he was using in his prosthetic – smashing the glass would be a dead giveaway, and he needed to play this cool.

“Now wait just a sec’, squirt. What’re you tryin’-”

“Oh! Hey, no, no. It’s okay. You don’t have to explain, and I won’t… I won’t say anything to Ginny or anyone else. I just… you look at him kinda the same way. And it’s a wedding, so I’m feeling a little sappy, and if you weren’t here I think Tony would be absolutely miserable, and… well. I just… I think he really, really likes you James.”

“Bucky.”

“What?”

“M’ friends call me Bucky.”

“Oh, so your name isn’t…?”

“Well, it is, but nobody ever…” Now she was looking at him with a Cheshire smile, and fuck, she was going to grow up to be as scary as her sister.

“So your name _is_ James. When did you two meet?”

“He’n my best friend, Stevie, met a couple-a months after he’n Pep split. Got introduced to ‘im a couple-a months after that.”

“So… two-ish years then? So he knew you before he started dating James. And he knew your name was James.”

“…yeah?”

“Oh my god. Boys are so dumb. Look, he sent us pictures of you! Well, he sent Ginny pictures of you, and don’t ever tell him she showed me, ‘cause he was being super shy about who got a look at his new stud-muffin of a boyfriend – that’s what he called you, by the way. We knew what you looked like months and months ago. So he wasn’t… he didn’t tell us about any old guy. He told us about _you_. But now you’re both here, both looking at each other like… like you don’t think you can have each other. So maybe I’m wrong, and you should just tell me to shut up, but… but Ja- Bucky? I think… if I’m _not_ wrong, that you should go for it. I think he really, really likes you. Tony doesn’t look at _anybody_ that way.”

Bucky wasn’t a coward, not by a longshot. He’d never be ashamed for needing three fingers of whiskey to steel his nerves after his dance with Pepper, and he’d never be ashamed for needing three more to deal with _this_. As the bartender poured his drink, he looked to Trish, refusing to acknowledge the way his fingers were trembling. “You… you really think?”

“Yeah. I do.” She was the sweetest fucking thing, and cute as a button, and if she came to NYU in the fall he and Stevie were gonna take care of her. Trish watched as he knocked back the alcohol, giving a wistful sigh. “God, so many people in this room would be so much more bearable if _I_ was allowed to do that. Now go!” She was laughing at him again as she pushed him out of his seat, green eyes sparkling merrily. “This dance is about to end – go get your man and claim the next one!”

“Yes’m.” Never one to ignore good advice, Bucky took a breath, squared his shoulders, and then went to claim his man. For a dance, anyway.

Once they got back to the hotel, maybe he’d get to claim him for a whole lot more.

~.~.~

The real kicker of it all was that Bucky hadn’t really _wanted_ to like Tony, not in the beginning.

Because Stevie was his brother in all but blood – though they both had scars down their right palms from where they’d tried to fix that in an idiot move when he was in fifth grade and Stevie in third – and he didn’t like what Tony did to his brother. Stevie’d come home from that stupid, prissy coffee place all red-cheeked with fury, huffing and puffing so much he’d need his inhaler, telling tales of some rich _asshole_ who got him all upset. Half the time, anyway – the other half, he’d come home rosy-cheeked with laughter, blue eyes sparkling as he talked about the adorably awkward genius who stumbled over his words when he got excited. Finding out they were _the same fucking person_ had understandably thrown Bucky for a loop. To be honest, he’d been pretty sure the guy was running some kind of skeezy scam on his innocent, naïve little Stevie – he’d build him up one encounter only to bring him down the next.

For Bucky, having seen some of Stevie’s more interesting relationships unfold, that set alarm bells a’ringing. Nobody like Brock Rumlow was ever getting near his brother ever again – over his dead fucking _body_ was scum like that gaining a foothold in Steve’s life.

So he listened to Stevie rant and coo in turns while trying to subtly steer him away from the relationship – it hadn’t worked. Not when the blond had more stubborn than the sky had stars; he’d decided he liked Tony, so that was just the end of that. And really, the more he listened the more it seemed like maybe this Tony fella wasn’t the only one at fault – Lord knew that when Steve was in a mood, there was no dealing with him. And sometimes the things Stevie reported Tony saying were so _obviously trollish_ and so completely contradictory to the things Stevie reported on good days that he thought maybe – just maybe – the wealthy genius liked winding the blond up and arguing with him.

He practically lived to get Stevie riled, so he couldn’t really judge the man for that. What he could and DID judge him for was getting Steve that worked up and out of breath without an inhaler nearby. There were limits, and he was going to lay them out very clearly when they met.

Then they _had_ met, and fuck. It’d certainly taken the wind out of his sails to see Tony try so hard to look casual when he had anxiety radiating from his every limb. He clearly wanted this to go well, because he’d probably heard as much about Bucky as he had about Tony; he just as clearly had no idea how to make that happen. He’d been sarcastic and vaguely insulting without meaning to be, was abrupt and overly touchy, and seemed to have no sense of any kind of social boundary.

He was helplessly awkward and obviously terrible at making friends, and Stevie’d sent him this ‘please can’t I keep him’ look, and… well. Bucky was always shit at telling the blond no. And so Tony became a fixture in their lives, one that even he would reluctantly admit to finding endearing. Even if he was older than them, he was absolute crap when it came to people, and he only seemed to have two friends besides Stevie, which… well. That had to fucking suck. And at first, he’d thought that’s where he’d end up with the man too – friends. 

Maybe that’s all it ever would have been if their pipes hadn’t burst one afternoon and their landlord hadn’t been so fucking passive aggressive about ‘getting them fixed’ while actually ignoring the problem. When Steve (in furious hysterics) called Tony to bitch about it, and how he and Bucky were frantically trying to save their belongings from the flooding, he hadn’t gotten very far before the other man had just… hung up. Which only lit the fire of Steve’s rage even hotter, until Bucky abandoned gathering up their shit in favor of getting Stevie to lay down on the couch and breath deep. The sound of the doorbell had him cursing and shouting for whoever it was – hopefully the fucking plumber – to just come in. He’d looked up when he heard someone clear their throat in the entryway… and just about had a heart attack.

Luckily, the shortness of breath and the clench in his chest was just all his blood running south, because there was Tony standing there looking like a wet dream. He’d never, ever seen Tony in jeans before that moment, and the pair he’d had on fit like a second skin, molded to his body comfortably from what had probably been years of wear. Both knees were ripped and frayed and (as he’d discover a little later to his delight) one of the pockets had ripped half-off along with the fabric beneath it, giving him a peek at the man’s toned ass because he apparently _didn’t always wear underwear_. As if that weren’t enough, he was in a tank top, arms bared and a helluva lot more muscular than Bucky would have ever thought. In one hand was a toolbox, while the other was running through his messy hair – when it fell to his side, the black strands still stuck up every-which way, and while the rest of the picture had his cock doing a happy little dance, that one fact was tugging strangely at his heartstrings. Tony’s face was covered in stubble, regular (prissy) beard just a little unkempt, and one cheek had a splotch of what was maybe engine grease smeared over it.

Like the start of a bad (fucking fantastic) porn, he cleared his throat again and asked what the problem seemed to be.

Bucky left Steve in a daze, and could only watch and marvel and try his best to hide his boner from Tony as he quickly and easily fixed the problem. It was definitely not sexy, seeing water drip down his form, and he was absolutely not captivated by the bronzed skin of the man’s bottom. He absolutely, for sure, didn’t moan out loud when Tony turned to him with a brilliant grin and then lifted the hem of his tank top to mop at his face, showing off a very respectable set of abs. He certainly wasn’t touched that the idiot had dropped everything to come help them out, fuck no.

He _was_ disappointed when Tony promptly passed out as soon as the problem was fixed, forcing Bucky to catch him so he wouldn’t hit the floor. He was pissed to discover that the man had been up for almost five days straight with little to eat, and he absolutely swore up a storm and slammed a lot of pots and pans around as he fixed the moron something to eat when he woke up. His boner shriveled up and died when he saw the way Stevie was fussing over him, but he refused to acknowledge the way something in his heart went a little dark as well.

Bucky was always, always shit at telling Steve no, and it had looked like his brother was staking a claim.

~.~.~

Lusting after the guy that Stevie was interested in was shamefully easy, and he just hadn’t been able to stop. He jerked off to the thought of Tony entirely too often, and began to bring home pastries to give to Steve as a sort of secret guilty apology gift. Still, he coulda handled that, was sure it would go away if the pair ever stopped dancing around each other and actually started dating. Realizing that he had _feelings_ for the guy was another fucking thing entirely. He tried to distance himself after that, making sure that he was friendly but not _too_ friendly. It sucked, and it was hard, especially when Tony started to send him wounded looks after every rebuffed gesture. The hurt in Tony’s eyes when he called the man ‘Steve’s friend’ nearly sent him to his knees to beg for an apology.

But he didn’t, and the guilt of hurting Tony and _wanting_ Tony ate at him every goddamned day.

It finally got to be too much, and he’d gone to Stevie, nearly crying in shame, apologizing profusely for being half in love with his brother’s best guy. The blond had taken a while to sort it all out, and when he had he nearly busted a nut laughing. In between wheezing giggles, he set the record straight; his merriment in light of Bucky’s suffering demanded retribution. After the wrestling match that Bucky would have won if he wasn’t so worried about kicking off an actual asthma attack, they’d both laid on the carpet as they talked through the whole thing. He’d gotten it all so, so wrong – Tony and Stevie were friends, and Steve didn’t _want_ anything more than that. As far as the blond knew, Tony didn’t either, and was in fact very single. The field was open, and Bucky could make a move.

Except… except now Tony kinda flinched from him sometimes, and the hurt that had been in his eyes so often lately had turned to casual disregard towards Bucky, and he knew it was his own fucking fault for trying to shut him out in the first place. There was a weird, strained civility between them now, and he got the feeling that Tony only still put up with him because he sorta came with Stevie. Served him right, but it still sucked donkey balls. And anyway, why would Tony – Anthony fucking _Stark_ , though it was sometimes easy to forget who he was – want him in the first place? He wasn’t exactly a ray of sunshine, he had a missing arm (though Tony did seem fascinated with the prosthetic replacement), barely made any money, and was only passably attractive. Tony was surrounded by perfection all the goddamn time – he hung out with movie stars and actual models, for fuck’s sake. How could Bucky compete with that?

He didn’t even try, not right away. Not until a meddling ginger with mischievous green eyes told him he had a chance. Not until a nosy girl who was too observant and too fucking sentimental made him hope. Not until after a few dances where he got to hold Tony close and a car ride where he flirted a bit to test the waters. Once they were on the couch together, he was ready to make his move, was just gathering up his courage… and Tony offered to set him up with one of the asshats from the party. Any of them – he could have an asshat of his choosing. It hadn’t been real between him and Tony; this hadn’t been the start of something. This wasn’t a cute, embarrassing story they could tell later about how they got together.

Trish was wrong – Tony didn’t want him. He wanted to be angry at her, as he stalked away from the couch, leaving a gaping asshole of a genius behind. He wanted to be furious at her for getting his hopes up, for making him think he could have something he’d wanted for… for a long time now. Maybe it was his fault for keeping Tony at arm’s length; maybe that was why Tony’d grouped him in with that bunch of asshats. Fuck, maybe their whole dynamic lately was why Tony had apparently used him as a template for his fake boyfriend. So he couldn’t be angry with Trish, because she hadn’t known. He wasn’t even all that mad at Tony. How could he be, when it was his own damn fault? He’d acted like an ass, so of course Tony would think of him that way.

Well, at least now he knew.

He’d use the rest of the night in the big, empty hotel bed to put his hopes permanently to rest.

**Author's Note:**

> Guys, guys, come say hi and maybe give me prompts on my [Tumblr](tahlreth.tumblr.com)!
> 
> Next on my list to update is "You You Think You Are", so if you read my other stuff, be on the lookout for that in the next few days!


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